boring care.

hahahaha! YES I still think its funny. anyway, I'm here at my moms board and care just wasting some time until I go pick up dez.

not much has been happening since monday. teddy is still being a brat. yesterday hiep and I had dinner w. my sister, the bro in law, and their kids. ate sushi at tomadotchi. good stuff. different from sushi deli. I've got to admit though, sushi deli has by far...the BEST miso soup. no other restaurant can compare. butttt, tomadotchi has some GOOOOOD dessert. I'm craving it as we speak!

I am jampacked lately! hiphop cardio/mani pedi with sister n moms on sat. pads game/mikes grad party on sun. tks bday dinner on thurs. dez' papia performance on the 30th. bodyrock on the 31st.

also, to add to me n hieps busy month next month we've got a road trip next month! hopefully everyone else can go also.

boring, boring, boring. ok lets spice this up a little more..

got this from my sisters page..

What were you doing five years ago?
I was working at circuit city. deciding whether or not I was gona go to reg. college or cosmetology.

What are/were five things on your to-do list for today?
- help moms out w. the board and care
- pick up dez
- babysit the little ones after my dad leaves for work
- hang out w. the boyfriend
- watch the lakers game

What five snacks do you enjoy?
- hooters 3 mile island wings.
- lemons.
- pickles.
- sprinkles cupcakes (my new found love).
- Flamin' Hot Cheetos.

What five things would you do if you were a billionaire?
- take care of my parents.
- share with my sisters and bf
- go to europe/japan
- give some to charity
- Invest and save the rest!

What are five of your bad habits?
- I crack my knuckles constantly.
- I'm number one on filipino time.
- like my sister, I'm a compulsive spender when I have money
- I HAVE to wear a tank top to sleep cause I hate when my shirt hikes up my armpits
- when I'm craving a certain type of food I WON'T settle for anything else

What are five places you have lived?
- in the hood (ph)
- in the boonies (murrieta)
- in the rich area (eastlake)
- on my sisters couch (chula vista)
- hieps room (scripps ranch) haha

What are five jobs you have had?
- robinsons may retail associate for the intimate apparel department.
- front des receptionist for primerica.
- product specialist at circuit city.
- kids club attendant at la fitness
- parts/service department for some car joint

what five people do you want to tag?
whoeva.


---- on another note, don't worry ate..ill be just as uncoordinated tomorrow. I have a feeling you're right though. I bet tomorrow all the young and more flexible girls are gonna be there. yipes!!

motherly-love

so, i guess you can say having teddy is almost like having a kid on your own. he cries when he cant see me, pees and poos around the clock, eats almost ALL the time, and is SPOILED-SPOILED-SPOILED. not only by me, but everyone around me. my dad is constantly checking my room to see what hes doing and if hes sleeping he'll grab him and bring him outside to hang out with him. katelyn follows him around. gets excited when she knows shes going to see him, cries when she leaves and is always "just tucking him in". she wont let her sister play with him. OH, imagine when alana tries to play with him, its gonna be a GIRLFIGHT. a good way to get her to behave though...

me: katelyn, make sure you share your toys with jacob or im not going to bring teddy here.

katelyn: oh! okay ninang! here jacob, play with ALL my toys.

haha. funny. yesterday after the madness of all the attention he was getting, hiep and i decided to leave him in his little room and go to archies. the guys played beer pong and dominos while lahh, lai, and i sat in the corner and talked. lahh had her puppy koa on her lap and we could NOT stop talking about our puppies. lai sat there and said, "you guys are talking about koa and teddy as if theyre your kids and im just sitting here, DEEJAY I WANT A DOG". deejays response, "ill get you a tamagotchi" HAHA, i was cracking up! take note, lai has a dog. his name is pico. well, his REAL names poncho but i call him pico. deejay didnt let lai take care of him. probably because he didnt want all the attention going to him so he put him in the backyard with no interaction with anybody whatsoever. now, the dog is feisty. well, from what hiep told me is that the dog was hyper to begin with and not friendly. always barking. a lot different from teddy. nonetheless, the dog is abandon in the backyard in a foursided gate. my dog however, is starting to think that he can sleep next to me at night. the only reason why ive been letting him is because its keeping him quiet at night while we have guests from p.i. but believe me, as soon as they leave and its just me and teddy in the house at night, he can cry all night and i can tune it out. i tune out hieps whining, how hard can it be? HAHAHAHA!!

boofuckinghoo.

yeah i said it, and i dont care.
I need some kind of cheering up.

lonely world

Beautiful mom can you smile?
Can you glow, can you sing me my favorite song?
Got fever, warm clothes are clean, kids are gone
What to do she's a sleeping sun.
She says birds fly out her window
She watches jealously
She says she's too old for new things
But mama you got wings

so, the cats out of the bag. im STRESSED.


ive tried so hard to hide it under a smile and a shrug but i guess eventually its bound to come out. i dont know what to do? go back to school to further more advance my knowledge? or get a job that i'll absolutely hate just to earn some greens. part of me thinks of just pursuing what i initially went to school for, cosmetology. but part of me wants to make MORE money doing something that'll make me feel good at the end of the day. going to school somewhere in the medical field is something my mom wanted me and my sisters to do as a permanent career. it sounds good, but am i capable? im sure if i put my heart into it id be able to do it. now my choice was to go back to school to become a teacher. i absolutely and undoubtedly loveeeee kids. i can be around them for hours. i remember working at la fitness in the kids section and as much as some of them drove me insane, i still loved seeing their little faces glow with happiness when id read them a book, draw them a picture, play wallball with them. it was priceless.

then theres the side of me that just wants to get a job that ill hate jus to make money. lately ive been stressed out financially. its not so much my problem but someone rather close to me. i want to help her out. i want to work hard, earn money, and just give it all to her. it makes me sad to see her stressed out about it. it makes me sad knowing that shes worried about so many other things that her financial struggles doesnt make it any easier for her. i just want her to be happy. i miss her smile. i miss when she didnt worry about all this stuff. sometimes i jus lay there with her and hug her because i want her to feel like eventually, at the end of this crazy mess, that everything will be okay. i cant help but cry when i think about all this stuff.

then i read risse's blog and thats when i think more than ever do i need god. that she needs god. that we all need god.

risses blog -"Matthew 11:28-30
28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

i pray everynight that he'll watch over her and make sure that shes being taken care of somehow because i know right now, i cant do it. n0w more then ever do i WISH i can take care of her. i see her struggle, and i see her trying to be the strong woman she once was and i know that shes trying her hardest not to let any of us worry. we'll be okay one day again, like we were before. we'll make it through. but for now, i gotta keep on being strong for her as well.

so im sorry to those who ive been not keeping in touch with. its nothing im trying to do intentionally. some say they think they can understand, but right now..i dont think anyone can. not even the boyfriend.

unrelated blog about absolutely nothing.

twinkles fun fact of the day: We are about 1 cm taller in the morning than in the evening. Layers of cartilage in the joints gets compressed during the day.

moving on

so its almost that time folks. im moving back to my old house in about, 3 days. am i excited? heck yeah! i think thats one of the main reasons its been hard for me to sleep at night. ill think about, "where should i put my bed?" or "will my tv fit on that side?" then i started thinking, "ok, do i REALLY want to paint my walls that color?" me and the hiepsta decided to start thursday that way the smell of paint can wear off by saturday. i was thinking of going for this color



ok thats about as descriptive as i can get. turquoise. i love that color for some odd reason.

either that or i was gonna go for a dark blue and bright red that way i can buy this..



we'll see what happens..

yesterday

was a pretty good day. hiep came over. played some wii. spent some qt time. he took a nap. i still cant figure out how the heck hes able to sleep on that darn couch. i guess ill never understand. he left to go finish studying and i met up with the best and jenny to eat some pho. me and the best went to target/walmart afterwards and did a whole lot of catching up seeing as i havent seen her for forever and missed her like crazy. we even saw this hag we were JUST talking about during dinner. HAHA. just the look of her makes me cringe. oh well. im sure jay loved that story.

ironman

tomorrow im taking the bf to watch ironman. will i like it? who knows. i know that i misjudged transformers. so we'll just have to see. i told him id watch ironman but that would mean hed have to watch sex and the city the movie with me. well, even if i didnt watch ironman..id still make him go with me. HAHA!


what else is on my mind..

myspace

oh yeah, so ive been thinking more and more...why is myspace so addicting and why cant i get off it? i swear, all it is..is pictures/comments. i dont get whats so fascinating about other peoples lives. haha. i catch myself sometimes going back to someones page that ive already seen thinking that something might magically appear. kind of like when youre really hungry but theres NO food. you go back and forth to the fridge like some magic elf might have left you some cookies. and then theres those peoples pages you WANT to look at it but when you see its private you curse at the world as if its most devestating thing thats ever happened to you. hahaha. you know you people know what im talking about! then theres the people who get offended if youre not on their "top". tom might as well make a "so and so's" top 204. that way EVERYONE will be pleased. myspace is a drug i tell ya, it'll make you go crazy.

aim convos.

i was talking to tk (toeknee) yesterday and we were so close to hitting up that alicia keys concert. butttt, eh. next time. his birthday functions coming up and im thinking of going to a few. i havent hung out with him since bar basic when he and ollie got into a fight. talk about a LONG time ago. maybe i'll bring some of my gals with me so i wont feel too awkward. he said to me, "yeah come! you'll never know who might show up". haha. hes so crazy. i love that guy!

rainy days

boy have i missed it. i love the rain. not everyday but once in a while its nice to look out and see everything all mellow. i love it cause it makes me feel lazy. a good lazy. the type of lazy where it just feels good to be under some comfy sheets watching some tv.



yesterday marked jeffs 4 months. 4 months? can you believe that? i swear it was just like yesterday that i said goodbye to him at glen abby. i read annes blog. very deep. dont worry cousin, when it comes to jeff i think about the same things. im sure everyone does. at least, everyone that i talk to does. hes in my prayers every night and in my thoughts everyday. life really isnt the same without him. i started thinking, will i ever be okay? sometimes i get scared that i'll forget how he sounds, what he looks like, how he laughs, how weird he was. i try to remember everything about him. i absolutely hate hate hate the fact that hes gone. whenever the 5th hits i always seem to wish i could figure out a way to get him back but i know that'll never happen.

i have a lot on my mind. a lot of things that are bothering me. but none of which i want to really discuss through blogs right now. lets just say, it sucks when the people you care about, dont really have your back like you thought they did. dont get me wrong, there are those who DO have my back and i appreciate it and i love you unconditionally for it. but the ones who dont are the ones im dissapointed in.

i am STILL in love with you.

twinkles fun fact of the day: a hummingbird weighs less than a penny.

yeah, you read the caption right. no matter what, i cant seem to NOT be in love with the jabbawockeez. yesterday the bf, lai, ronnie, and i went to the e40 concert where the jabbawockeez were going to perform (pictures will be up as soon as lai uploads). we waited a good hour in line and the whole time we kept saying "man, we shouldve got something to drink." the more time passed the more we wasted time NOT getting alcohol in our system. we FINALLY got in and went to the booths to check out the shirts. the bf was kind enough to get me another shirt, this time in a girl size. tell me why the small was TOO small. lai and i ended up getting a medium.



ronnie got a shirt for him and deejay since deejay is probably the biggest fan outta the guys and couldnt go due to being in p.i. OH BUT WOULD HE HAVE LOVED IT! we get some dranky dranks and headed towards the stage to get some good spots. we got MAJORLY good spots. i scooted in front of this tall girl standing in front of me. as hiep would say, "we got the nice side of the crowd". normally girls would be "OH HELL NO THIS BIOTCH DID NOT JUST GO IN FRONT OF ME." i guess she understood because lai and i are tiny. we waited, waited, waited, waited, and waited. our buzzes wore off, ronnie was tired from getting too hyphy too early & i had to be SO SO SO SO bad! but! i wasnt going to go to the bathroom and miss my hunnies. then there they came.



i was screaming so loud that it was starting to hurt my throat. i'll admit, i was going NUTSO (yeah i dont care what you people think haha). and yes, OH YES..phil touched my hand. their performance was so damn good. afterwards we enjoyed the rest of the concert. got hyphy. well, ronnie did. HAHA! i just enjoyed the music and moved my toosh. lai and i bought masks hoping to get them signed but we didnt have a pen. we got to take pictures with ben



chris


saso


rainen


and phil


seperately. afterwards i couldnt help but stare at our treasures. thank you lai, for the best night of my life. haha!

may 31st my sister, my niece, and i are going to bodyrock so des can get a feel of the hip hop culture. im sure she'll love it. i cant wait to see her grow and become a good dancer. my sister says we might be able to hang out with her friend thats helping out. woohoo! fun stuff!!

yesterday.

twinkles fun fact of the day: Cows are incapable of putting their lips together to make sounds like humans, so they are actually saying "OOOOO" instead of "Moo."

happy 1st of the month bloggers!

i offically got my cousin sucked into the world of blogspot.com. funny huh? youd think with all that she does in her daily routine she wouldnt have time for a blog let alone her myspace. but low and behold, what you dont know is she goes home on her lunch to catch up on her myspace time. HAHA! i revealed your secret! anywho, lets see how long she actually keeps hers updated. HAHA.





to sum up the rest of wednesday. i practically didnt do shit. picked up desiree we went to the store to buy some food to cook and ended up getting brownie mix. it turned out pretty damn delicious if you ask me. i tried to take a nap but somewhere inbetween that i was interrupted with katelyns "can someone open the gate so i can get my horse?" now i wouldve got up and done it for her but even i cant seem to get my sisters baby proof contraptions to work myself. i have to get des to do it for me. along with that there were two girls making out in the middle of the room while juggling fire (happy hiep. haha). i ended up just getting up and going on aim. the cousin wanted to go on a coffee run so i decided to make a trip to the hood. we got coffee, some guys in their cool looking ford with their tupac music blasted to the max were trying to call out to us but us being the snotty bitches we are pretended like we had other things to do like play with our sidekicks. paul wanted soy in his coffee but we didnt give it to him. HAHA. we got back to the house and just youtubed it and much like our old fri/sat nights when we'd sit in front of the computer on the couch catching up on our gossip girl. blairs such a bitch, I LOVE IT!

i was on the way home from my cousins house when leona lewis - yesterday came on my ipod. for some reason it made me think of jeff. i miss him like crazy. bleugh. the lyrics just had so much to say. i sat in silence while i drove and just listened to the words. its so true, they can never have yesterday.

I just cant believe your gone, still waitin for mornin to come, when i see if the sun will
Rise,in the way that your by my side, oooo where we had so much in store, tell me what is it
All reaching for, when were through building memories il hold yesterday in my heart, in my heart

They can take tomorrow and the plans we made, they can take the music that wel never play, all
The broken dreams, take everything, just take it away, but they can never have yesterday, they
Can take the future that wel never know they can take the places that we said we will go, all
The broken dreams take everything, just take it away, but they can never have yesterday

You always choose to stay, i should be thankful for everyday, heaven knows what the future
Holds, or least where the story goes, i never believed untill now, i know il see you again im
Sure, no its not selfish to ask for more, one more night one more day one more smile on your
Face but they cant take yesterday,

They can take tomorrow and the plans we made, they take the music that wel never play, all the
Broken dreams take everythin, just take it away, but they can never have yesterday, they can
Take the future that wel never know, they can take the places that we said we will go, all the
Broken dreams, take everything, just take it away, but they can never have yesterday.

I thought our days would last forever, but it wasnt our destiny, coz in my mind we had so much
Time, but i was so wrong, no i can believe me i can still find the strengh in the moments we
Made
im lookin back on yesterday

something to entertain you..