the reason why alcohol is my enemy..

I absolutely HATE hangovers. big ones, little ones. its just that feeling in the morning that you can't concentrate. like someone had drained all the saliva out of your mouth and no matter how much water you drink it seems to just soak up within minutes.

I have never played so much beer pong until I met hiep. his friends (which are my friends now also) play almost everytime we hang out. I think were the reason the plastic cup company has been able to make all the fancy shmancy looking ones now. you know, the multiple colors and such with all the money we put into it every other day. haha. don't get me wrong though, beer pong is the absolute shit. I remember a time when wed play at athenas in san marcos and boy did I suck! now I think I've gotten it figured out. hah. we played the usual 6 cup with 2 people. one day though, mike decided to crank it up a notch. now we play 28 cups w. 4 people. calling it "4 by 4". haha. same rules just a little longer but a little more intense. yesterday I played 3 games. 1 reg and 2 4by4's and lost each game. therefore, was pretty dang drunk leaving me a bad headache. oh well, all worth it for a good time.

congrats to the girl added to thee girlfriends corner!! more girls to play beer pong with. =D

"if the girlfriends don't like you, you probably won't last" hahahha. freakin lahh.

anywhoo. I woke up this morning to babysit the kids till the motherload got home. hiep said he was gona be here at 7am. by 7:45 I already knew he was still sleeping. as soon as jacob fell asleep I hopped into the shower to wake myself up a little. I got out and found my bf in my room watching tv. 8oclock. not bad. I looked to my right and there sat a vase full of red roses. ahhh, my bf. the charmer. =) what can I say? he's the best.

todays plans: delmeezy w. the gangola!!

like a pizza in an oven..

I'm burning up! holy freakin moly. you'd think that because I don't get any sort of sun light in my room itd be cooler than a polar bears toenail...nope! its still freakin hot as heccck in there. its worse when hieps laying next to me. its like more body heat. this is why I love winter. dangit.

( btw, thanks lai for reading up on my posts, you're awesome! =] )

lately I've been studying up on my exam for my test. I hope I pass.

today I woke up exceptionally later than usual. 12pm! geezus. I got up, got ready and headed out the door. I was totally sidetracked w. my thoughts that I missed the route I was trying to go. I somehow ended up on the 805 s. I exited bonita and before going to my destination thought I'd make an unexpected turn into glen abbey. I parked and headed to wear jeff rests. sat beside him and put a new candle in kristines lantern and lit it up. left him a menthol light while I lit mine. we smoked, well I smoked. I imagined he was up there doing the same. told him my thoughts, what's been happening, that like everyday I miss him more than ever. I don't want him feeling like I've forgotten him.

afterwards I said my goodbyes and went to young ideas hair salon to meet w. ghemma. hopefully her owner says she can use me as an assistant. dropped by my older sisters house to pick up some clothes and to check if my book came in yet. no luck. bah. got food for my mom and here I am, dying in heat.

today I'm actually going to attend my cardio class along w. my sister and her friends liza and janette. its been a while...2 weeks maybe? since my last class. after going to two and feeling how pumped and energetic I am days after makes me really wanna go frequently because I noticed that the last 2 weeks have been leaving me L-A-Z-Y again. I hate it!

hopefully this saturday marjee & sheila come along as well. =D

happy friday!

for anyone who's concerned (which you're probably not) the boyfriend and I are ok.

on a much lighter note, I never got to mention how the jabbawockeez (YES another jabbawockeez entry, hiep WAS right and no ate I am NOT borderline stalker..ok just a little) went to my nieces dance studio to practice. well, some of the jabbs used to teach there so I wasn't so surprised. I was however, pretty bummed when I found out ben was there. my goodness is he a looker. my sister even said, 'yea he is cuter in person' ...MMHMM!! you said it! anyway, they were nice enough to take the time out and sign autos and take pics w. my niece and her dance group. she got her shoe signed by rainen and phi and got rainen, ben, saso, and phi to sign her yearbook. ahh, ben..my little sweetheart. haha! jk. I was about to take my ass, pick up lai and head over there. but my sister said they were leaving. SHUCKS! ..hiep reminded me "you knooooow, you DID take a picture w. him at 4th and b". haha. he's silly. I'm glad he doesn't mind my super obsession w. the jabbs.

I was bummed that I also missed ANOTHER david henry cardio class. crapS! this saturday. I hope I hope! I need to feel the burrrrnn!

speaking of dancers. I've seriously watched americas best dance crew season 2 about 10 or more times already. I think I could do most of the dances. ok no. I'm dissapointed in all the "jabb" fans that all of a sudden like supreme soul. don't get me wrong. they're good BUT not as good as my hotties. the shorter guy IS cute. hehe. but if I have to pick a favorite, I like SoRealCru from houston? I think that's where they're from. they're dances are sexy. boogie bots from dc is pretty ill also. but I still gotta root for super cr3w from vegas. GO WESTCOAST!!

I'd like to also say..

its so crazy. I've never gotten into basketball until I met hiep. I guess also its because we watch it with all his friends which makes it more exciting. but even when its jus us two, he's just so into it that the vibe goes through me. I was sad to see their loss in the second half when their first half was just too good to be true. kobe is STILL fine though. yumS!

when I scream..is anyone listening?

I feel like I'm trapped in a bubble where no one can hear me. like those dreams where you're standing and someones coming after you yet you can't move. you're scared out of your mind and your yelling for someone to wake you from this wretched dream. you're trying to pull your body off the floor to run away but all of a sudden its as if someone had drilled nails to your feet so you can't leave. think I'm overexaggerating? I'm totally not.

what makes a relationship work? communication and understanding am I right? but how does that work when the type of communication you're getting is just question after question. how does it work when they're too busy trying to be right to fully understand why you're feeling the way you do. how will it work when one just walks away from an issue hoping it will just go away just like that (yes, I admit that even I'M not helping in this situation) or that my hand against someones face will make things better. its not about the small issue, its not about a blanket..or who's right or wrong. its about feeling like youve done something good by going out of your way (and no they didn't ask u to do it) to please a person and all they do is take it for granted. that's what its about. and if I'm wrong for feeling like my actions have been put to the side for the mere fact of being right. then so be it.

I've never gotten phsyical with anyone but does it ever cross ones mind that the reason why I do it is cause they push my buttons? maybe the way I can push a persons buttons to curse and yell at me the way they do when I walk away. cause I know that's what makes them mad.

this isn't healthy. I want us to be healthy. I want us to have an understanding of each other. I know I can't change a person but I wish we can come to a conclusion of how to handle situations without it ending up the way it does. I guess the only way that can happen is through communication is it not? don't get me wrong. he totally understands me when were not fighting. but when we are its like he's a different person. this person who doesn't care to see how I'm feeling because he's so tuned out. it scares me. he knows it scares me. I just hope one day, it will never have to be like this again. I love him. I really do. I don't even care if he doesn't feel the same way back. I love him not for his temper but for everything except that. I have faith that one day well be able to handle things better. but does he?

spice up your life..

I was reading some old blogs and I noticed I haven't stunned u guys with some of my facts. mainly because I've been blogging on my sk since I don't have internet yet.

also, I noticed how SOME of my entries are witty and some jus are plain boring. don't get me wrong everyone! I'm a lot more funny in person, I swear. however, if you'd like some good hillarious knee slapping blogs please visit, shere1.blogspot.com. sorry ate, I can't do that cool thing you do where you can click the name and it'll link it to their blog. haha.

so yesterday I was bored and had a lot of time to kill before I was going to meet up w. the couples for some dinner at old town. I decided to join my sister and watch dez go to her hiphop classes. we get there and dez and her class are sitting around while my sister and I sat and waited. in comes the hot instructor as he dances his way through the two opened doors. he gives me a look and a smile, takes my hand gives me a twirl. he looks into my eyes and says, "you are the hottest hip hop cardio girl I've ever seen in MY LIFE". then I snap into reality as my sister is talking about her car incident the day before. haha. ok ok, hot dance instructor or HDI..wasn't there yesterday. my sister and I did check out dez' dance instructor bust some moves. YUM, CHOC-OH-LATAY.

(dance instructor goes up to turn aircon in room)
me: oh no, its ok, don't do that....JUST SWEAT. hahahahaha

I waited for hiep to pick me up at the studio while I watched a hip hop cardio class in session. made a couple friends while I sat around and watched giggles triumphantly bust her moves WITH her eyes closed and the hiepster look alike from the back who was flayling his arms here and there w. the beat who ALSO had his eyes closed (or were they open and I jus couldn't tell? who knows).

I decided I'm gona take hip hop classes. hiep was making fun of me when I told him my golden news.

me: do u think I can do it?
him: I think u can do it. do I think you'll be coordinated while doing it? that's another story..
me: I can be coordinated!!
him: are u going to be one of those dancers who cry while dancing cuz their so into it..u might here a chris brown song come on and jus start tearing cuz youre so into the movements..

I should post up a picture of exactly how he thinks ill look during hip hop classes. haha. asshole.

afterwards met up some of the gang at old town where we ate at some mexican joint. I like how mike says over the phone, "yea, twinkle! its the mexican cafe with the lady tossing up tortillas". we get there and there's 6 mexican cafes and maybe 3 with ladies tossing up tortillas. haha. food was good. I was stuffed. we made our way to 32nd for some wednesday night bowling. I gotta say, I missed our wednesday night outings. now that archie works mornings again, looks like our boring phase has passed. had fun. drank some beers, bowled some balls. jesse hendrickson came by also. it was nice seeing him after how many years! talked to him for a bit.

went home & the bf came back to sleepovers w. me and teddy.

todays plans? visit jeff then lakers game w. the gang.



*** 5 months today ***
rest in peace jeffster. love & miss you.

and I'm dancing like I've never danced before..

Its been a while since I wrote in here. mainly because I don't have much internet access and my sk is a pain in the ass when blogging. but I'm here, and I can't sleep so why not?

also, I've been spending a lot of time w. the bf and tedsters. he's getting a lot better! now he's no longer leashed as much and does his bizznazz on his mat. phew! patience is key, patience is key.

before I go on talking about my new found hobby let me take a minute and gripe about something. can I express enough how much I hate mall parking lot structures? today the bf and I decide to go eat at sushi deli. we take my car and there was some telemundo thing by the restaurant which made us have to park at the mall. we were so excited for sushi (god knows why, we eat there almost every week) that we didn't bother to look where we had parked. not to mention we got completely lost trying to find the entrance to the mall so we could validate. we kept telling each other, "its gona be a bitch finding the car cuz we didn't bother to look at what FRUIT we parked at"..thank god for those by the way, the little numbers w. the fruit, veggie, disney character right next to it. so we eat, go back to the parking structure and what do you know. WERE LOST. we spent a good 30 minutes looking for hieps car then finally we realized, "oh shit, we didn't take his car..we took mine". if we had known that 30 minutes earlier then when it dawned on us, we woulda found my car because we past the level it was in. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWSH.

my sister and I found a new hobby. yup, HIP HOP CARDIO. we went the other weekend when it was free. there were so many people that we didn't have much room to move around. that class, WAS EASY PEAZY! we ended up getting more classes and even my sisters friend janette joined us. the other week we took the 1030 am class. last sat we decided to take the 930 w. a different teacher. lets just say, my legs blew out from trying to impress the hot dance instructor. hahaha! yup, should've just stuck to the 1030 am class. jk. no but really, his class was actually a lot better because I felt like I really worked out. despite I lost my train of thought when he'd come in front of me, my sister, and janette to see if we got the moves right. teehee, of course, he can't compare to my jabbawockee of a bf who knows how to do the chest move. haha. Mmm sexy! anywho, I can't wait for another good workout this week!

that saturday after the workout I got home and got ready, went to my sisters for a bit then went home to meet up the bf. we hung out till it was time for me to go to bodyrock. the bf stayed at my house while I left. bodyrock was pretty damn awesome. I had fun. I'm seriously thinking of taking hip hop classes! along w. my hula with lai. funtimes. afterwards, we met up w. my sisters friend liza and her fam..yes, which includes belle..rainens (jabbawockeez) wife. I was hoping she didn't recognize me that night lai and I went jabbahunting. haha! I got home. chilled then slept at hiepstas house.

I guesss that's it? my fingers hurt.

also, wisha me luck on my interviews this week!


-- 4 month mark & still going strong<3